Do you find yourself stuck in your current job, feeling a pit in your stomach right after you start working?
Do you keep asking yourself: “How can I find a way out of here?“
I know exactly how that feels. Every job surely has its own challenges, but here are a few of the struggles I dealt with at my door-to-door job, where I booked free energy efficiency surveys:
– Feeling unwelcome, looked down upon and being mocked.
– Dealing with rejections, disrespect, aggression and lies .
– Being cold and wet (as you know, Ireland is not known for its nice weather:)).
– Having nowhere to go to the restroom.
– Robotically repeating the same doorstep pitch and hiding the fact the survey is about selling.
– Consistently walking the same area every two to three months.
I found it extremely difficult to be positive when dealing with negative people and often felt my energy was drained after an hour or two of work.
If it wasn’t for meditation, talking with my husband and my son I would not have survived very long. There was actually one thing I was looking forward to before starting work…going to Insomnia for my favourite Matcha latte with coconut milk 🙂
On really bad days, I screamed in my car completely frustrated: “I cannot do this anymore! I hate this job! “ All I wanted was to go home and play with my son, Gasper.
Within the last year, I have had to switch nannies seven different times and when the last babysitter came, Gasper needed more love and attention than ever before. He would often come crying into our bedroom calling “Mama! Mama!”
This made me realize that something had to change. I had never dreaded going to work so much in my entire life and for me, that was unacceptable. Sacrificing my son’s and my own happiness for a job I didn’t even like!
So I decided to quit. After a year and 3 months. Yaaaay!
Oh God, I cannot even describe to you how good it feels to be home with my little boy! Seeing his happy face means everything to me.
So, when is the right time to quit your job?
There is no right answer, but here are some clues that might help you decide if you should start considering to quit your job:
- The environment you are in is not aligned with your personal values
Ever since I have started this new job, I never felt honesty, integrity or team spirit among my colleagues or management. But I thought that I could still make it work if I made my work into a challenge or a game and focus on all the positive aspects of the job. This didn’t really ever improve my enjoyment in my old job, it just prolonged my decision to quit.
I learned that my instincts were right from the start. But I ignored them.
- The pain is unbearable and you cannot keep forcing yourself anymore
- You feel that you are a victim, that you do not have any other choice
- You want to prove to yourself and others that you can withstand all the pain
I wanted to prove myself and others that I can be tough and resilient. I thought that I could be so positive and mentally bulletproof that the rejections and negativity wouldn’t impact me. But in the end I realized that I was just denying what my feelings were telling me.
I was playing a game I couldn’t win because I was playing a game against myself.
My door-to-door job wasn’t the only time I denied my own feelings. I endured eight years of studying German and Polish, pushing myself and being disgusted by the teachers and piles of boring literature just to prove my father that I could do it, so that he would finally be proud of me. Did it help? Yes, he shut his mouth for 1 day and then he found something else I was doing wrong. Were eight years of tears and sweat worth of one day of praise?
Even if I think I need to prove something, wouldn’t it be better to prove that I can actually live a joyful life, that I don’t need to suffer in order to grow and be happy? That would be much more enjoyable process than proving myself that I can withstand all the resistance.
You are not here to suffer and by enduring through the suffering you don’t prove anything to anybody. Isn’t suffering already a lesson in and of itself?
I started thinking about my ideal day. It created a new possibility, a vision where I flow through the day with ease and joy, following the path of my heart no matter what it takes rather than compromising what I believe like I did with this job: “This job is fine BUT I have to lie…This is fine BUT…“
Let’s create a life without a BUT! Are you with me?
Create a life based on your true values. Your dreams matter so go out there and make a mark on the world! You are WORTH IT!